Baby Showers have changed a lot over the years. Gone are the days of women-only events that fit a specific format, now, they’re more casual, more inclusive and more adaptable. There's no right or wrong, when it comes to hosting a baby shower, the idea is to simply have a fun day surrounded by loved ones and celebrate the upcoming arrival!
Baby Shower Etiquette
What is a baby shower?
A baby shower is a gathering of friends, family and/or co-workers which celebrates the upcoming arrival of a new baby. It’s a traditional way to celebrate the new baby and mother-to-be during pregnancy, before the baby arrives and usually involves gift-giving. Traditionally a baby shower is given for the mother’s first baby, although now it's more common to have a baby shower for each child.
What happens at a baby shower?
Baby showers are all different depending on the time of year, if it’s a first baby, who’s hosting it, where it’s hosted and your culture. Some people prefer a baby shower in the morning, other’s an afternoon tea and some a low-key barbecue dinner. Depending on who’s hosting the shower, it may be held at the mother-to-be’s home, a friend or relative’s house or even a restaurant. If it’s during summer, it may be hosted outdoors at a park or the beach, especially if there’s younger children involved.
No matter what time of day, there's always food involved and usually some sort of baby shower games. Whilst some attendees may roll their eyes at Baby Shower games, such as “guess the baby food” or “what’s the baby poo?”, they can be a good way to break the ice and add some fun. Depending on who’s attending the shower some hosts may set up activities where guests are encouraged to decorate a piece of art to hang in the baby's room or match the baby photo to the adult at the shower. These are much less cliche than some of those traditional baby-shower games!
Like a wedding, some hosts will also offer favours when guests leave to thank them for coming. Whilst this isn’t usually the case in New Zealand, it is common in other parts of the world.
Who hosts a baby shower?
Most often, it’s a close friend of the mother-to-be who organises a baby shower, however it could also be the expected baby’s grandmother, god parent or mother-in-law. Occasionally a baby shower is organised by the father-to-be, or the parents-to-be may arrange and host it together, especially if it’s not their first baby.
Who is invited to a baby shower?
Traditionally it was mainly girlfriends and female family members (Mum’s, sisters, mother-in-law etc) who were invited to Baby Showers. Nowadays, it's much more common to invite all your friends and family, whether male or female. Although Baby Showers were traditionally an adults-only affair, now even the littlest members of the family, such as other babies and toddlers are often invited. Ultimately, it’s up to the host who they will invite and what type of baby shower they’ll be hosting.
When is the best time to host a baby shower?
A baby shower is usually hosted in the last trimester, most often in the last few weeks of pregnancy. By this time, most people will know the gender (if they wanted to reveal this prior to bubs being born) and will have a list of outstanding items they want or need. There’s no absolute rule though.
Do I have to bring a gift?
Most guests will bring a gift to the baby shower, however most people prefer presence over presents. Some attendees may choose to wait until after the baby is born to give something for mum or baby and others may choose not to give at all. It’s up to you if you wish to give a gift and how much you want to spend. If it’s a family member or close friend you’ve known for a long time, you may wish to spend a little more, or if there’s a close-knit group of friends you may all choose to chip in and buy something together.
What are the best baby shower gifts?
It really depends on the mother-to-be, your relationship with her and your budget. Some guests may choose to give baby clothing which is practical but also gorgeous, whilst others may choose to buy a delivery of high quality frozen meals to make life as a new mum easier. Some guests may group together and choose a gift voucher for a store and some may buy something to treat mum, such as a lush pair of pyjamas or a gorgeously soft robe. There’s plenty of options, for the organised mum, the matchy-matchy mum, the 2nd time mum and more.